


Too Young to Feel This Old

by PrimordialPaper



Category: Fairy Tail
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Family Feels, Gen, Post-Alvarez Teikoku | Alvarez Empire Arc, Team as Family, Wendy Marvell Gets a Hug, Wendy Marvell Needs a Hug
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-08
Updated: 2020-06-08
Packaged: 2021-03-03 18:41:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,326
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24610219
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PrimordialPaper/pseuds/PrimordialPaper
Summary: My fears came to life the day you left, and I've been fighting off these monsters ever since.- Christy Ann Martine
Relationships: Chelia Blendy & Wendy Marvell, Irene Belserion & Wendy Marvell, Natsu Dragneel & Gray Fullbuster & Happy & Lucy Heartfilia & Wendy Marvell & Erza Scarlet, Wendy Marvell & Gajeel Redfox
Comments: 6
Kudos: 46





	Too Young to Feel This Old

**Author's Note:**

> The cast of FT as a whole has more issues than tissues, certainly, but I felt like taking a stab at Wendy's no doubt MASSIVE abandonment issues.

It would always be with great fondness that Wendy recalled her tenure at Lamia Scale, and the year she spent sharing a residence with Chelia. In one of the darkest, most uncertain chapters of her life, the Sky God Slayer and her guild had been a much needed beacon of light and warmth to the then former Fairy Tail mage. Even after her departure from Lamia Scale, and Fairy Tail’s resurrection, Wendy held the memory of her time there close to her heart. There was, however, one event amidst those memories that struck a discordant note among the lighter-toned recollections.  


Chelia always slept far more soundly than Wendy herself did.  


The occasions in which the Sky God Slayer was roused abruptly from sleep were few and far between, and were occupied with colorful anecdotes such as, “I dreamed we were back at our match in the Grand Magic Games, but I was in my pajamas! You even roasted me, Wendy!” and “Everyone had eyebrows like Yuka. _Everyone_. Hold me, for I may never recover.”  


Chelia’s nightmares were so... normal.  


* * *

“You were shouting Carla’s name, Wendy. Telling her to run.”  


“... Was I?”  


“I’m always here, if you want to talk about it, you know?”  


“I... I know. Thank you, Chelia.”

* * *

“So... her name was Grandina, then?”  


“...”  


“I’m so sorry, Wendy.”  


“ _C-Chelia_ -”  


* * *

Wendy almost wanted to laugh, bitterly, as those moments flitted across her mind while she sat up in her bed, fingers twisted in the sheets, her free hand wiping harshly at the wetness on her cheeks. Perhaps God Slayers, too, were granted heightened senses like herself and her fellow Dragon Slayers, for the normal precautions she took to conceal her sudden wakefulness from Carla rarely, if ever, managed to fool Chelia.  


As it was, the only other presence within her dorm at Fairy Hills was the snow-colored Exceed. Her friend’s deep, even breaths assured Wendy that she was still asleep. Thankfully. Had Carla been awake, there was no doubt in Wendy’s mind that she’d urge her to talk about whatever she’d seen that had affected her so. Creations of the unconscious mind rarely held together when spoken and dissected aloud, she’d say. Carla was practical like that.  


Not that it mattered. Common sense might overcome an embarrassing figment of improper attire, or overzealous eyebrows, but it was useless against the haunting visions spun from one’s own memories.  


All the levelheaded logic in the world couldn’t quell the terror Wendy felt when she found herself back underground, with air that was so sickly sweet it was almost nauseating. She beheld a towering, off-white monolith of stone, her heartbeat ramping up with every oppressive, faultless tick of the countdown.  


Or when Wendy was haunted by the memory of Carla’s slick blood beneath her fingers, the far away look in her eyes as she lay, unmoving, on the ground after taking the attack meant for her... Her hand burning from simply touching her foe... The searing pain as her leg was pierced clean through...  


As awful as those experiences had been, Wendy would have honestly preferred them to the nightmare she awoken from tonight. When her mother had disappeared ( _left_ ), when Jellal- Mystogan- had entrusted ( _abandoned_ ) her to Cait Shelter, her young mind hadn’t fully been able to process the ramifications of her situation, only aware that two people she trusted and loved were no longer around.  


That childish ignorance had long since left her. Wendy was intimately familiar with the feeling of abandonment, the initial fear and panic at suddenly being alone that slowly sharpened into heartbreak over the loss of people that she wasn’t ready to be without. Her nightmare had been a cruel rendition of the first abandonment she was old enough to fully grasp; the end of the guild Cait Shelter, made even worse by the extra additions.  


She’d been forced to watch in horror as not just her former guild, but _everyone_ she’d ever known, everyone in the world who cared even the slightest bit about her, flickered and scattered into motes of light to be carried away by the wind, leaving her _alone_ , as she’d long suspected she was cursed to be...  


Wendy shook her head. She’d given up despair, she reminded herself.  


Closing her eyes, Wendy reached out with her senses, both physical and magic. All around her, she could sense the presence of her fellow residents, sleeping peacefully. They were here, she wasn’t alone.  


“ _Deus Zero_.”  


Wendy knew it was shameful, to give any credence to the voices hissing that she should doubt her good fortune, to just _make sure_. It didn’t stop her from allowing the Separation Enchantment to pulse outwards, snuffing out the lacrima-topped lamps within the premises as any surrounding magic momentarily faltered under her spell. Once more, Wendy expanded her sense of perception. Carla, Erza, Juvia, Levy, Bisca, Evergreen, Cana, and Laki. All present and accounted for. She had not been fooled once more. They were here, they were _real_.  


Wendy held on to that thought as she laid back down beside Carla. Fairy Tail had defied entire empires, both their own and those abroad, for the sake of their family. They weren’t going anywhere.

* * *

“Gajeel, could I please borrow a blade? Preferably a dagger, if possible.”  


The raven-haired man looked up from the guitar he’d been meticulously tuning, a studded brow quirked upwards at her request.  


“I think you’ve been spendin’ too much time with Titania, kiddo.”  


Wendy’s laugh was only slightly strained. Erza had already left Fairy Hills when she’d woken up that morning. What was more, Wendy hadn’t seen her or any of her other teammates after arriving at the guild. She was determined not to worry about it. “It’s to practice my magic. I know how to place Enchantments on people, but I need more practice with casting them on objects. Your iron is very sturdy, which makes it perfect to practice on.”  


That got a grin out of Gajeel. “Smooth talker.” coating his hands in metal, he cupped them together, beams of green light escaping between his fingers. Slowly, Gajeel moved his hands apart, revealing a length of metal suspended between his palms. Wendy watched, fascinated, as the mass of iron twisted and rippled like water, shaping itself into a dark grey dagger.  


“Don’t cut yourself, Wen.” Gajeel cautioned lightly, offering the weapon with the handle pointed at her. Wendy accepted it happily, bowing as she thanked the older Dragon Slayer, to which Gajeel simply ruffled her hair good-naturedly and sent her off.  


Her training implement in hand, Wendy claimed a table near the back of the guildhall where it was less likely she’d be disturbed. Aside from the added benefit of taking her mind off last night’s dream, she really had been eager to improve this area of her abilities. Given that two of her teammates, Erza and Gray, fought quite extensively with weapons, it would surely be of great use for her to perfect this skill.  


Letting out a slow breath, Wendy coaxed her power into the dagger before her, gradually suffusing the blade with the soft blue light of her Enchantments.  


It was a curious sensation, casting an Enchantment upon an object.  


When Wendy affixed her magic to another person, another living being, she could sense their response, feel the way their magic power was bolstered by her own. She’d have likened it to a second heartbeat, thumping independent from her own as she maintained the ancillary bond between herself and the subject of her magic.  


It’s what made Enchanting large groups a difficult task, especially when in combat. Being attuned to so many individuals, so many _souls_ , all with their magic at its zenith, all brimming with the instinctual adrenaline of battle; it was easy to lose herself in the maelstrom of feedback.  


Enchanting objects was quite different. Wendy could sense the well-tempered strength of the steel knife, the keen edge of it’s blade. But the weapon was silent. It possessed no heartbeat, no well of magic power for her to tap into.  


“ _You could change that, my little dragon._ ”  


There was a frustrating lilt to the husky, saccharine voice that suddenly sounded in Wendy’s ear, as if the speaker was amused by the limits of her spellwork. Wendy raised her head to frown at the incorporeal visage of Irene Belserion now sitting across from her. Draped in the same black robes she had worn while alive, though lacking the long, hanging hat, Irene reclined on the chair with all the elegance one would expect of a former queen.  


Wendy disliked her a little bit more purely for how effortlessly graceful she made sitting on a wooden chair look.  


“I could give this knife a heartbeat?” she groused under her breath, turning her gaze to her hands, bleeding soft blue light, so as not to appear to be conversing with an invisible table-mate. Her age of fourteen years old aside, the memory of Cait Shelter made her loathe to claim she was just speaking to an imaginary friend, if someone asked. Wendy doubted she’d be able to stomach it.  


Irene leaned forward, her smile as sharp as the talon-tipped finger she trailed down the length of the dagger. “ _It’s one of the many talents of us Enchanters, to grant form and function to the inanimate. My two best traveling companions were a pair of swords, in truth._ ” unbidden, an image of two women, clad respectively in black and white, flashed before Wendy’s mind’s eye. In a blink, the memory shifted to two similarly colored swords plunged into the ground.  


Wendy felt vexation crawl up her spine. Irene, she knew, had very nearly killed Mira as recompense for defeating her two companions. As if two Enchanted automatons were worth anything close to the life of her friend.  


Only fools grew to love people that weren’t even real.  


The warning groan of bending metal as the dagger began to shudder went unnoticed.  


“ _All the capabilities of human servants, while possessing hearts and minds you can mold to your liking._ ” Irene carried on. “ _Much more reliable than most humans, I’ve found. Given the compatibility between us, I’m sure a part of you agrees._ ”  


Wendy looked up, narrowing her eyes at the ghostly Spriggan. Irene’s capacity for cruelty and spite was no less expansive than the scope of her Enchantment abilities. The phantom ache of self-inflicted gouges in her side was a testament to that.  


Nonetheless, the woman beneath the witch, the mother who endured years of torture and still thought only of her unborn child’s safety, could occasionally be seen.  


Her words seemed more of a bitter, cynical warning from a woman who’d lost all faith in the world, rather than a taunt from a vengeful sorceress.  


But that didn’t mean she was right. They _weren’t_ compatible. Not in any way that mattered. Wendy still believed in the world- the people- around her.  


The memory of last night, falling back into the long-buried fear that those around her were little more than figments of magic given form, almost gave her pause, but she shunted it aside. It was only because of the nightmare she’d had. Nothing more.  


“I don’t need or want servants.” Wendy declared firmly. “I can rely on my guildmates- my _family_ \- for anything. I have faith in them.”  


The Scarlet Despair sighed, shaking her head as if Wendy was simply being stubborn. Her form waned, and began to fade from sight. “ _Fib to my face all you want, dear. But can you really lie within your own mind?_ ”  


A complicated whorl of emotions greeted Irene’s parting remark, not the least among them being anger. Anger at Irene for insinuating she doubted her comrades. Anger at herself, for the seemingly permanent knot of wariness at the bottom of her heart that said she _did_.  


To any passersby, it was fairly easy to presume that the scowl marring Wendy’s face was due to the contorted, hopelessly mangled state of the dagger lying on the table before her.

* * *

Wendy’s “brief” practice session ended up carrying on until the guildhall began closing down for the evening, in no small part due to her habit of venting her emotions through excessive training.  


Huh... maybe Gajeel was right about her spending too much time with the guild’s favorite redhead.  


She spent multiple hours ensconced in her corner of the guildhall, muttering Enchantments over her warped practice blade. And it certainly hadn’t been a pointless endeavor; she managed to render the dagger featherlight, and increase it’s durability several times over, but she’d admit to being a bit distracted.  


Irene’s words had needled at her ever since their conversation had ended, her thoughts going round and round in circles in her mind.  


Of course she trusted her guildmates. They’d supported her, and stood by her side ever since she’d first joined.  


However, her ardent faith meant little to the voice in the back of her mind, urging her to be watchful, to be wary. Insisting that the home she’d found with Fairy Tail wouldn’t last, just like none of her other homes had lasted. She was almost tempted to separate those feelings with an Enchantment, if only to be free from their constant prodding at the wounds she doubted would ever fully heal.  


Talking to the unshakable pillar of strength that was Erza Scarlet had helped before, in moments like these, but the redheaded swordswoman was nowhere to be found. None of her teammates, in fact, had set foot inside the guildhall at all today. Had they gone on a job without her?  


Before Wendy could further entertain that disheartening thought, the Lacrima Phone in her pocket gave a peppy chirp. With one hand still raised to maintain the Enchantment on the dagger, she managed to extricate the device with her free right hand. Brown eyes roved over the message hovering at the top of the screen.  


Atop the table, the dagger drooped and sagged like candle wax, before dissolving into a small heap of dust.  


Not that Wendy noticed, already barreling out the guildhall doors like she was trying to stop a murder.  


**[Natsu Dragneel]**  
**WENDY COME TO YOUR DORM ROOM IT'S AN EMERGENCY!!!!!**  


She might as well have flown to Fairy Hills, with how quickly she arrived. It’s possible she _did_ , at least a little bit at the end there. The stairs and hallways were traversed in little more than a blur, before she was throwing open the door to her room, anticipating being greeted by a grievously wounded friend, or some manner of enemy.  


The sight awaiting her inside was so far from her expectations, that Wendy found herself rooted to the spot.  


Balloons of varying shades (notably white and azure) were tethered to multiple surfaces throughout her living room. Atop her small kitchen table rested a cake, frosted sky-blue and bearing delicate clumps of spun sugar that resembled clouds. The unmistakable scent of darjeeling tea hung in the air.  


When she’d left that morning, those things hadn’t been there. Nor had the _people_. There was no way she would have missed the sight of four such distinctive, familiar mages.  


“ _Surprise!_ ”  


Unlike Lucy, who was almost always indignant and dismayed when the team let themselves into her apartment, Wendy was simply confused.  


“What’s... all this for?”  


It wasn’t her birthday (as far as she knew. Grandina hadn’t known the exact date, only that she’d been born sometime midwinter. It was currently May). She hadn’t accomplished anything deserving of a celebration lately (Natsu had wanted to commemorate her newfound motion sickness months ago, but she’d been too miserable to agree). She wracked her brain for any important event she’d forgotten, something that had occurred in years past around this time...  


“It’s the anniversary of you joining the team!” Natsu cheered, beaming.  


Wendy went very still. Surely, they weren’t referring to...  


“The _second_ anniversary, actually.” Lucy amended. “Or the ninth, if we include the time on Tenrou.”  


This time, two years ago... They’d been on a boat, the five of them...  


“The guild was split up this time last year,” Gray further explained. “so there was no way we were gonna miss it this time around.”  


She hadn’t even realized, back then... Too mired in the loss of her first guild... Their first voyage as a team...  


Erza stepped forward. Calloused, yet gentle hands came to rest on Wendy’s shoulders. It felt like lifetimes ago, not two years, when she’d first felt this touch. It had been with only one hand, back then.  


“It’s understandable if it pains you to remember that day. There’s no shame in that. But try to recall what I told you then.”  


Wendy didn’t have to try. As long as she lived, she’d never forget the words that had saved her from despair.  


“Your friends are here to help you bear your pain, and that goes twofold for teammates. Before you’d even officially joined Fairy Tail, we had already decided that we’d stick by you. That we wouldn’t let you be alone.”  


Wendy all but collapsed into the hug Erza offered. It didn’t take long for the rest of the team to huddle closer; Lucy pressing herself against her back, Natsu’s overly warm hand gripping her shoulder, a cool peck from Gray on the crown of her head.  


These four... these erratic, overzealous, _wonderful_ wizards had witnessed her at her lowest point, collapsed on the ground in tears over the loss of what had been her entire world for the past seven years, and they had done something that no one else had attempted with her before.  


She had been chosen by Grandina. She knew now, about her role as a vessel, an unwitting tool in the centuries-old plot to defeat Achnologia. But the Sky Dragon had been just as much a mother to her as she’d been an instructor. For the sake of their goal, however, her mother had vanished, hidden away from her. Grandina had taught her.  


She had stumbled across Mystogan; still a child himself, but with a duty that went beyond his years. His tender heart that had urged him to care for her was eventually outweighed by his devotion to his mission. Their time together came to an end, and he’d been forced to go on without her. Mystogan had saved her.  


She had been thrust upon Roubaul, a ghost with his own unshirkable purpose, to guard the instrument of his people’s demise. He had done all he could to give her what any child needed; a place to live in and people to talk to. Even if it had all been imaginary. Her make believe friends couldn’t stay, though, and they’d had to leave. Cait Shelter had raised her.  


Wendy’s life had been littered with temporary families, impermanent homes. Due to circumstances beyond her control, she’d had little say in the path she took, or the people she met. So many choices had been made for her, either by others or by the need to survive. When it came down to it, those that had cared for her, for better or worse, consistently chose something- their plan, their mission, their duty- over her. None of them were willing to stay.  


Fairy Tail was different. They gave her a _choice_. Did she want to be a member of their guild? They were utterly guileless, with no smoke and mirrors or plots or motives beyond offering to her something they thought could help. To them, Wendy wasn’t a pawn, or a burden, or a tool, or a charity case. She was a little girl without any place in the world.  


Not anymore.  


She had more friends than she could count. She had a guild that proved time and time again that they were too strong to disappear. She had a family that looked out for its own. She had a place on Fairy Tail’s strongest team.  


Everything was going to be just fine.  


She had faith.


End file.
